November 3, 2019
"Becoming A More Confident YOU" with Dorothy Ratusny
the Wisdom Podcast Season 1 Episode 6
Podcast Intro: 0-2:12 | Free Bonus Curated Content to Download for this Episode! 2:13 | What Makes A Person Confident? 3:55 | The Definition of Confidence: 5:54 | The Three Most Effective Ways to Build Self-Confidence: 8:36 | The Rationale for These Three Best Practices 12:30 | Growing Your Confidence: 16:54 | BONUS Practice #1: 17:34 | BONUS Practice #2: 22:06
If you ever wanted to feel more self-confident and deserving of your successes and to own what I call your 'greatness', then this episode is going to be the strategy that you need. If you want to feel the confidence of knowing that your decisions are the right and best ones for you; and to have greater confidence in all that you do, then the 3 best practices that I am about to share, are going to make it easy for you build greater confidence and to live empowered because of what you think and believe about yourself.
In this episode we dive into what makes a person confident, and how you can grow your confidence to extreme levels by choice; because confidence grows with your affirmative words of yourself. Changing the inner landscape of your thoughts to empower rather than diminish your abilities, grows confidence exponentially. Your inner dialogue then becomes the sacred and empowering messaging that you live by.
In other words, you are more careful about what you tell yourself and believe because you experience directly the effects of your words felt throughout your being. This enables you to follow a path that is inspiring; and true to who you are. As you develop a daily practice using these 3 strategies, you begin to feel encouraged by your words and as you take the steps towards completing what is most meaningful to you; and which nourishes your inner being. These three practices are incredibly simple, your results are directly correlated to making them a daily habit; as you re-train your mind unto what is true and what you will believe of yourself to be possible.
Confidence is a person's belief that a chosen course of action is the right choice and that they can properly perform that action. As a personality trait, confidence is sometimes referred to as self-confidence. This term describes the attitudes and beliefs people hold regarding their abilities and strengths. *Source: goodtherapy.org
How do you define confidence? What does it mean to you?
To become more of something, you must first know what more will be. What are the ways in which you want to be more confident?
So at some point during or at the end of this podcast, I'd love for you to make a few notes; deciding the ways in which you wish to be more confident. Then, use the strategies here in these best practices to help mobilize yourself towards building a more confident you as a personality trait and as belief in your ability to make the right choices for yourself and to be successful in your actions.
For example, maybe you want to be more confident in your interactions with others and how you speak and carry a conversation. Or perhaps you want to be more confident in the way that you parent, or in how you are at work with co-workers and your boss. Perhaps you want to be better at owning your successes and feeling greater confidence in your decision making along a path that will be right and best for you. When you identify the areas in which you want to have more confidence, then you can begin towards this taking the specific action steps that you need to accomplish this.
Many people want to have greater self-confidence but they haven't clearly defined the areas in which they want this.
To build confidence, use these 3 simple and yet overlooked successful practices:
1. The first practice of self-confidence is the importance of mindfulness of what you say to yourself at all times. What you tell yourself, you believe. Be far more attentive and discerning to your inner dialogue. This may be shocking at times when you realize what you have been telling yourself that causes self-doubt, insecurity, and fear. 2. Choose deliberately the words that you speak both inwardly and aloud (and what images you hold in your mind). Begin to define the beliefs that you want to hold regardless of whether you believe in them fully yet. Confidence grows with encouragement and kindness. You must be willing to see your goodness, and to acknowledge what makes you uniquely different, special, and talented. (Sometimes this may be precisely what we have been teased or judged harshly for). How you are different from others is often a strength. You can best develop your strengths and confidence by curating a list that highlights the ways in which you are capable; what you see as your positive traits and abilities; and how you are resilient. Remind yourself of this using phrases and keywords that you repeat often. For example, "I am innately wise." "I am a talented _________ (and fill in the blank here) (e.g. writer/musician/performer/artist/speaker)." "I am defining my success and living it fully." "I have an important purpose in the world that I am living now." Your written list and how you remind yourself of your talents and abilities is how you re-train your mind to hold belief in yourself and to grow your confidence and worth. *'I AM' and 'I HAVE' statements reflect manifesting this in the here and now. They bring all of what you want into the present moment for you to witness each time that you reinforce this with your words spoken quietly and aloud. It goes without saying that you must have fun with this process. Your positive feelings of yourself will grow your confidence. 3. The third practice of self-confidence is this: confidence grows when you take action; when you challenge yourself in new situations, and as you learn and improve. Your encouraging words spoken inward and aloud remind you of your strengths and positive traits is how you feel encouraged to try new things, to better yourself further and to take more positive action which in turn builds confidence and competency. When you challenge yourself to grow and become better through positive action, you grow confidence and belief in yourself.
These 3 practices also require your ongoing effort as you are teaching yourself how to think differently from what has likely been a well ingrained habit of critical and negative self-talk over a lengthy period of time. It will be helpful if you can enjoy as you grow belief in yourself and as you nurture esteem and worth.
You grow confidence each time you acknowledge your greatness. Acknowledging your greatness is reminding yourself - remembering - how incredible you are. We all have unique gifts and talents that simply need our attention, and our willingness to use these to become even more skilled at them. This is an important part of what we are here to do in this life; to enjoy the journey of expressing and using our innate talents and gifts in a way in which we enjoy and feel inspired by. This is what is meant by finding and living your life's purpose. To remind yourself of all that you are good at and enjoy is helpful to mobilize you towards this and to live it. You grow self-confidence each time that you recognize your innate talents and abilities and what effort you have made in becoming better at this.
You must make it a regular practice to acknowledge the positive aspects of yourself. This is how you feel encouraged and supported in who you already are.
Acknowledging the positive relentlessly grows confidence and your belief in your abilities and in making the right decisions.
There are no hidden secrets to growing confidence; just the mindful and regular attention that you give to what you tell yourself and what you are willing to believe. Remember that the words you speak inside your mind are going to determine how you feel and what choices you will make; including any inaction that comes from your lack of belief in yourself. Kind words and encouragement that become your daily mantra will result in positive feelings and behaviours; and the belief in your ability and worth. This encourages you to continue taking positive steps towards all that you desire; to believe endlessly in your potential and the having of what you want, and to never give up.
In addition to this list of 3 best practices, here are a few additional strategies and tips for increasing your positive feelings of yourself and becoming more confident.
- Similar to thinking about what you are grateful of, which helps immensely to change your mood state, to boost your positive feelings and to feel encouraged; write and keep an ongoing list of what allows you to feel good (and even great) about yourself. This is a powerful way to grow self confidence quickly. This is something that you can do daily; that you can practice deliberately to feel encouraged, and in moments when you need to be reminded of your immense ability for accomplishing all that you deem to be most important and set your mind to.
- Seek to know yourself and to live your truth. This means paying attention to what is right for you; of practising moving in the direction of what makes you happiest. This is using happiness and joy as your inner GPS that guides you in your life towards these ideals and goals that are what inspires you. This is important since the more you develop your knowledge of who you are; the more confident you are in exuding your presence, your self-knowledge and in your accurate decision making. Begin to speak aloud your truth (practice being wholly honest with yourself and others) about what you think and believe in and what is right and best for you. As you practice voicing your truth it will reinforce that you know yourself best and it will help you to be accountable to what is right for you. We all deserve and can have a high level of confidence - confidence is not ego - but rather it is the positive feelings that come with believing in your self and your abilities. Being self-encouraging and kind will empower you to try new experiences, and to make changes of yourself and how you approach and live life that will support and grow your confidence. This happens as you acknowledge and remind yourself of your value, your worthiness and that you are more than capable of whatever you choose to do.
Self esteem and self confidence transcend every thought, every action, and all of how you feel. If you would like my help to build and redefine your confidence, please reach out to me. Your confidence is so valuable for what you believe is possible for yourself and your life.
As a challenge, if you would like more practice in being a more confident version of yourself, you can make a pact to become the very best version of who you are. Set out to change one thing about yourself that you have been wanting to improve. Let yourself gather what information you need to make this change. Seek out what professional help, books, courses, and any other support that will allow you to be successful at this. The happier you are with who you are, and how you are choosing to be, the more your confidence grows. Choose something to change that you feel inspired by. As you begin to make changes to one aspect of your life, you will likely notice other desired changes being easier to make.
When we recognize aspects of our personality, our behaviours, or our thoughts and beliefs that are no longer serving us, and if we do not take the steps towards changing this, then we will continue to feel less confident in these areas. Make an effort to change even if the change you want takes time; doing so will be so rewarding and it will boost your confidence in your ability to make other changes. Make it a priority to become the very best version of you; and to begin this now.
As a special offering of love and something that will also help immensely each time you experience it, enjoy the guided visualization 'I AM' that I've curated specifically for becoming more confident and for believing in yourself. It will help you visualize how you want to be - now, and to live as this even whilst you are manifesting and growing your confidence.
Sharing the wisdom and beauty of divine love with you...
Podcast Theme Music: 'Aura' by Illuvia www.eternell.net/album/illuvia
Accompanying Music: Eternell, 'Kalimba'
A generous 'thank you' to Audio Engineer, P. Kirpikau for your excellent work!